Counselling for repeating patterns
If you keep finding yourself in the same situations despite your best efforts to change, there's usually a reason. Therapy can help you see what's driving the pattern so you can start to do things differently.
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When you can't seem to break the cycle
Repeating patterns can be one of the most frustrating things to live with. You can see what's happening, you know it's not working, and yet you keep ending up in the same place. It might show up in relationships, where you always seem to attract the same type of person or fall into the same dynamic. It might be at work, where you take on too much and burn out, then start again somewhere else and do exactly the same thing.
Sometimes the pattern is more internal. You might set yourself goals and then sabotage them just when things start going well. Or you might notice a cycle of building yourself up and then tearing yourself down.
These patterns aren't random, and they're not a character flaw. They usually started as a way of coping with something, and they made sense at the time. The problem is that they keep running long after the original situation has passed.
How psychodynamic therapy helps with repeating patterns
This is where psychodynamic therapy really comes into its own. It was essentially designed for exactly this kind of work.
The idea is straightforward: the patterns we repeat as adults are often rooted in earlier experiences. We develop ways of relating to ourselves and others based on what we learned growing up, and those ways become automatic. They operate below the surface, shaping our choices before we even realise it.
In therapy, we bring those patterns into view. We explore where they started, what purpose they once served, and what keeps them going now. This isn't a quick process, but it's a lasting one. When you truly understand why you do what you do, you gain the freedom to choose differently.
You're not stuck
If you've been going round in circles and can't work out why, therapy can help you see the pattern and find a way out. I'm happy to have a conversation about it.